If you just realise what i just realise....

12 July 2oo8

Had my last driving lesson. Oh-My-God.... Dunno wat the heck is wrong with me... Wait... Okay. I do know wat's wrong.. Haizzz...

My mood goes like down down down then steady then down.... =.="" Yesterday begin with hill.. The engine keep dying... =.="" Not only that, instead of turning left i turn right!!! Kanasai wan.. Luckily that time i was in the parking area. Not rili moving, coz i have to turn the stereng to the fullest first. Then, once, i din stop before the white line bcoz i rili had no mood dy... The other instructor beside was like telling the girl, "U see. If exam, like this is fail" =.="" Issshhhh... Geram... Did i do anything to you, mister? ZZzzz... Then i heard mariah carey's bye bye and colbie caillat's realise on radio.. One after another. Worst.. Watery eyes dy... T.T

And then, went out to the road to practice the exam route... Okay okay la... Trying to focus.. On the road, dun play-play weyh... =.=""" Know wat i did?? While i was on my way back, my engine die off 3 times, same spot, on the slope!!! =.="" Can you imagine? I'm the first car and the green light for the right turning is just 5 seconds!! In other words, i missed three times of the green light!!! =.="" Instructor asks "aiyo. wat happen lar???" Then he says "Nvm, you're just tired already". But i know, thats not the reason.

At night went ate dinner with Julianne. All-but-one tuna's were there. Except Racho again! Unlucky day. Julianne's phone got stolen. Stupid asshole. Never let the bastard spoil our day, we went to the night market near her house and ate at the coffee shop there. Everyone was like looking at us coz some of them were wearing a bit too over for a coffee shop? Initially, we planned to go to restaurants in Metro Prima until her dad ask us to eat nearby coz he's worried about our safety after the incident. We chatted, gossiped, joked, laughed... But inside, i'm crying... T.T Anyway, good to see Jul again and the rest of them. 8 of us squeezed in the room and sat on the bed.. Thank God the bed frame did not break... =.=" And not to forget, i heard realise again in twins' car... =.="" Wanna cry dy that time...

Tuesday maybe gonna accompany Jul to the airport and bid farewell to her. Mayb....

13 July 2oo8

Went church early in the morning. In the car I heard realise again!!! God, what you wanna do uh? Seriously its been quiet a while since i heard of this song. Before that was like almost everyday until newer songs were out. But i just heard 5 times already since Friday!!! What's going on? T.T

Moody moody, sky also gloomy gloomy.. =.="" Everytime i think of him i will just hug Devillie. He said there is a reason that he chose Devillie as my bday present. He told me "Whenever you miss me and need me, just hug it as me." T.T and yeah, i'm hugging it!!! But I want to hug you more... T.T If i kiss devillie, will it turn into him?? T.T How i wish....

I feel so lost, so confuse... God gave me hope. He sent me a prince.. In a very special way that i never thought of. So sweet, so funny, so cute... So memorable.... But why want it to end so miserably? T.T

"Baby, i will wait for you. Coz i dunno what else i can do. Don't tell me i ran out of time, if it takes the rest of my life. Baby, I will wait for you. If you think i'm fine, it just ain't true. I really need you in my life, No matter wat i have to do, i'll wait for you....."

Feel so lost, so confuse... Went and try those love calculator thingie... =.="" Can't believe i just did that. Yeah, i did alot of things unpredictably. I'm just so random these days. Told you, i was lost right. No real sense of direction. Majority was of high score!!! T.T but why??? I just dun und....... Where has things gone wrong????? T.T

Steffie with Devillie

"If you just realise what i just realise, then we'll be perfect for each other, then we'll never find another............................. "