I never knew i can hurt like this.....

Ate dinner just now... Din get to eat much... Even with my fav dish, crab! And my fav soup! Normally i'll eat 4 crabs, mayb? And 3 bowls of soup. This time... i ate only 2 with one bowl of soup. I cant even finish my rice. Only managed to force half of it into my mouth. T.T Rili hope that i will get back my appetite. Get back what i once have............ My happiness... My blisssfulness... My love...

Tommorrow's driving lesson is at 8am!! And i'm not sleeping yet... I can't sleep. Hopefully i will be able to concentrate on the road tomorrow. Coz my mind now is flooded with him. I dowanna bang anything... I know it's dangerous.... T.T Monday's my driving exam already.. I dunno how can i pass it with this mood now... But, whatever it is... I'll passed it!!! I'll do it for him!!! Confident is what i need rite?

I miss him....... As long as i'm awake, he's all i'm thinking of. Every other voice or sound suddenly became so soft... i can't hear.......... Hopefully i can hear my instructor's voice. Otherwise.... U imagine yourself la.... Goinf left instead of right. Stepping on the brake pedal instead of clutch. Going to reverse gear instead of 4th... Hope it'll never happen..

Dad ask me just now... U sick ah? Wan see doctor? i say no-lah... where got.... (ya.... i heart sick... broken.... T.T) He said i look tired... Lolx.... that's bcoz i cried until my eye swollen n tired. What to do? I need to cry myself to sleep... Make myself as tired as i can.. And also make myself as busy as i can..... But nothing i can do........ Just dun have the mood.... Remembered he once say... "Dun cry, i can feel it" T.T

I cried... I think at least 5 hours today? Litening to the song bye bye by Mariah Carey over n over again... Makes me cry even more... My tears just flow like the tap water which cant stop flowing and need some plumbing work.... =.="" Everytime i broke up.... There goes.... Every single word of the song is so clear..... Previously i always complain i cant hear the lyrics precisely... All of a sudden, those words just become so loud and clear to my ears!!! And damn it... 80% of English songs are about love!!! OMG!!! Whether its happy or sad, i'll still feel like crying... And most of the time, i'll have to hold back my tears!! T.T suffering...

The pain that i felt now.... Is as if to the extent that i need painkillers!!!! No kidding... You may think i'm exagerating.. I just realise i got a red mark on my hand... Not very big tho. I think i accidentally burnt myself a little.. I din even realise when i actually accidentally hurt myself... Scary, huh?

I recall... The moment which happen 2 months ago... We fought badly for some stupid reasons and my stupid ignorance... He left me at the stairs.... But not any longer than 30 seconds, he's back!!! I was first disapponted that he just walk away... I asked how can you left me here like that... He says i could have chase after him........ Then i was angry... I said the 2 most hurting word (break up).... But then he held me tight... He said he will not let go of me.................. Felt so warm... So sweet.... No matter how i try to get myself off, he still held on tight... How i wish, i can do that to him rite now... This time, me being the one who say this to him..............

Where has that determined "person" gone?? Why are you determined in the other direction now??? Why this time you're the one who wanna let go??? Why you're the one who gave up on me....... T.T

I will never ever forget that moment..

Sincerely and innocently, in my heart, i hope this is just a test from God!!!

吴健豪，我会永远爱你的!!!!